Me, myself and I...
Beeing gay in Croatia might be problematic, but is it the fact that im sexually different oriented or just the fact that I'm just myself, without acting, that makes life such a riddle? Follow me through my life and help me discover my role in this whole story called life.

Have a look...
www.gay.hr
www.gay.ch
www.youtube.com

...searching the meaning of life!

27.01.2007., subota

shup up and sing or your life will be over!

Runaway bride? Hmmmm! I was just thinking about getting married and about the proposal which I’ve got yesterday. Would I be prepared for the ONE? Is there a time when you're ready for the one final step? We where just browsing in bridal magazines with some coworkers in my company, what is it about that whole marriage thing? Why do we need an endorsement from a third person for our love? I guess that's just a paper which makes us believe that the partner’s loyal.

It's Saturday evening and I’m sitting at home writing my blog, what the hell is going on? I become more and more apathetic; there is absolutely no mind for going out and party. I just want to stay at home and watch a good movie, drinking and eating good staff and going to bed as early as possible. I think it's just this fucking winter time which drives me crazy, and having nobody on my side makes the whole thing even worst.

So anyway, I need some rest.

Greets and love

Leona

- 23:07 - Komentari (1) - Isprintaj - #

25.01.2007., četvrtak

easy silence

a broken heart served on silver platter, the see is moving without ending, being alone on the couch, bad smell, drinking till' you forget everything...

there's a stain on the couch, it's irremovable just like my thoughts about you, they're always here, they haven't any meaning just like the stain, but they're here. There's an easy silence in my life, don't know if it's the big silence before the big storm but something's gonna happen.

autumn just past away, the winter never was, I feel just like autumn. There is nothing in me, the good time is past and there is nothing in front of me. All life's death. I'm holding on to a little bit of energy coming from nowhere and all I want is summer. But maybe autumn's good for my love life. Is being single really that bad? Are we just with somebody to get the grant that we're wanted and loved? Is having a partner the solution on loneliness?

It's quite late, I need some rest. Love you all and be good.

Bunifa

- 00:01 - Komentari (1) - Isprintaj - #

12.01.2007., petak

keep hitting the same note...

over and over again. This was my thought about the breaking up of my last relationship. How fast can love turn into friendship? It's now 2 days ago since our break-up and today we're pretending to be friends. to whom are we lying? I'm not sure if he's doing that not to show his real emotions of any other reason, but being friends now is just impossible.

I’m fine with the fact that's over now but at the moment, there's no space for more. I don't know what's worst; hurt or disappointing? After every break-up I was hurt, it's a naturally feeling which comes and go and once forgotten...friends. But it's the first time that I'm just disappointed. And this feeling is eating me up, because I'm on the phone for hours with him and I can't say that to him. He's so sensitive and breakable and in a bad mood right now, telling him more bad news would kill him for sure.

Ok, now's just the question: what's now? What's next? I'm since 2 years constantly in relationships, the longest break that i had was for 2 weeks. But I'm really tired of playing games, of all that bad promises with no content. Hearing "I love you" after a couple of days again. I'm just so sick of all that love stuff. maybe this disappointment was just right in time to calm down and to stop and to take a deep breath before the real thing comes through. My best friend read me the cards, and there is a blonde guy in my life which will come sooner as I can imagine...Believing the cards, he has to be the ONE!

So, we'll see.

- 20:22 - Komentari (2) - Isprintaj - #

07.01.2007., nedjelja

Not ready to make nice!

Just got back from my vacation in my hometown Switzerland. Things definitely changed. We lost a good friend and the worst thing about that is that there is no going back, there is no more space for an apologize. I'm not ready to make nice. Being abroad and watching the situation from far away and not having the control is not that easy and the worst thing about that is that I still want to be a part of everything.

I had quite fun days, at least it was to short. I saw a person which was very close to me and now we're just friends. Feeling his touch and looking him in the eyes recalled memories from good past times.

He asked me about my new boyfriend and about my intentions with him, I didn't know what to answer I felt that kind of uncomfortable that I lied. He said that there is still space and hope for us two, maybe one day will find ourselves together again. I was surprised about this sentence as I broke up with him. How strong must feelings be to forgive and forget? I always said that I'm to good to forgive and that i won't, we'll see about that.

I’ve some strange feelings about some things and I have to figure out if they’re true, so I have to go, see ya soon.

Cowboys & kisses

- 13:55 - Komentari (0) - Isprintaj - #

<< Prethodni mjesec | Sljedeći mjesec >>